Sex Pistol Fuck Forever

2012-02-02T15:07:00.003+08:00

dear blogger

i hope i really did get the job , hope they inform me when to start :/ lol & i hope i dont need to pay my phone bill or needa give them money now . i mean its for my poly , if i dont work i dont think they will give me any money to buy new clothes . poly leh , cannot wear anyhow one =.=

and things kinda get way shittier . as days goes by i realised how shitty the problem i had in front of me all these time . to think for the 2nd or 3rd time , i think its quite weird for me to be under my father's custody but ive been living with my mum eversince they're divorced . but i really want to live with my father tho . i want to start afresh with my brother and father . i know things are just fucked up for us .

i have a father who lives at his workplace and any of my family members including me rarely gets to meet him & i have a brother who is a tranny and have been living on his own since he was 18 & also rarely gets to meet him . i know they are so lost , they just do what they've always been doing and cant think about the future . i know they need some guidance and be controlled . but it sucks , when i really wanna try to help but realised that i just cant do anything . i know little things can help a bit but i guess not for my case . maybe im younger than them , so they dont really listen and take my words seriously .

i cant help but blame my mother for all these . even my aunt said so , even my friends too when i told them about the whole thing . i just hate her , i dont wanna live with her . whats worse is that her new husband is also getting fucked up as days goes by . they're expecting me to work and use my own money for my school fees and also provide for myself . i did work early this year , not obeying them but bcos i dont wanna see their fucking faces and furthermore maybe trying to train myself to provide for myself so when i start on my permanent job next time i can live on my own and not see their faces again .

but then something unfortunate happened , my grandma whom took care of me when i was small & i was close with was admitted to ICU . it was really torturing to see her in that kind of state , i keep on breaking down & i swear that was the only time when i really 'doa' to allah damn a lot to save my grandma bcos no one could handle it if she is gone . i made up my mind to quit work cos i wanna be by my grandma's side all the way . i mean you can find work anytime but if your loved ones is on the verge of dying , thats the only time you will have to see them .

for 2 weeks i went to the hospital consecutively , overnight there for a few days too . the irritating part is , my fking mother can actually think that i went out with my friends & even overnight with them =.= ! she's also mad bcos i quitted my job , WTF SHE'S JUST A PERSON WITH NO FKING HEART , THERE I AM CRYING EVERY SINGLE NIGHT COS I DONT WANNA LOSE MY GRANDMA , THERE SHE IS THOUGHT THAT I WENT OUT HAVING FUN . THE FUCK ? but thank god my grandma is fine now , just that the doctor said the sickness will come again so we will be expecting the whole thing to happen again . but i really hope it wont happen again .

so just recently i went out to look for a job again , my mum said that 'want to work for what later you will quit after a few days' . seriously ? she thinks that i quitted for fun . what the actual fuck ? & her husband also the same , want me to work only and get my own money so i can pay for my own stuff so dont need to use theirs .

i just wanna get out of this house and start afresh with my father and brother . my mum dont need me . my father and brother needs each other . i pity myself for being in sucha situation . life is so unfair . i dont want my father to be skinny & growing white hair so fast cos thats what i realised when i finally saw him at the hospital visiting my grandma , which is his mother lul =.=

i really hope things will be fine , it gets really frustrating when a bunch of problems came at a time .

380th post

2011-09-19T19:29:00.003+08:00

ouh btw i think my head looks so big in this pic .
dont think i'll update blogger that frequently . didnt post for quite some time is it ? O's in 34 days , WTF . imma avoid laptop for 4 days/week , max 1 and half hours . k wth skali i didnt follow my own rules . k bye .

2011-09-13T23:40:00.002+08:00

k sch's like totally shitty but also sometimes kinda better in certain areas . one thing i know now is i hate my bio teacher , i cannot get a single shit learned from my chemistry teacher = total fail for science . seriously i wanna drop science . plus i dont get it , why would i need to learn so many subjects when im just aiming for L1R4 . learn other subjects will just waste my time only . thinking of just 1 goddamn subject that i hate plus the teachers who makes it worse for me can really makes me mood go down , like really downnnn .

i seriously hate the feeling i get when i sensed the teachers are demoralising me . it just sucks big time . id rather have them not bothering about me than saying somethings which really freaking pisses me off . sometimes i do get the feeling like - "ouh im gonna make today really productive" & like really doing the best i could & then there would be just some fucking shit that happens & just totally bring me back to that i-dont-give-a-fuck-about-school attitude . i mean im really trying but i just hate it when shit happens , especially when teachers are the one who made that shit happen to me =.=

people always say sacrifice for just this year & something like - its the heart which really counts or wtv . but cmon for someone who stays at the east side like me to go all the way to the west side for school every single morning , you will get fucking tired of it . i can assure that you will eventually get tired of it , yea eventually . people talk like its so easy but they know nothing about it . for 2 years , i get sick of it , freaking tired of it . its not really easy , it really affects my mood a lot . i know i talk all these shit & should prolly just move the fuck on & deal with it . yeah im just doing it for the sake of doing it but sometimes it just really get effed up & just wanna babble about it =.=

i feel like giving up my O's . i feel like i couldnt think anymore for myself or something . its like totally blank & idk what to do , what's really effective for me . dont know why im being in such a situation & why im like the unfortunate one to go through all these stupid shitsxz but still important for my future . i mean O's is already one hell of a task & yet i have some other issues which kinda acts like a barrier towards me from getting a good solid grade .

nevertheless , my princess keeps me up .
i loveeeeeeeeeeeeee princess

goodnight/goodmorning

2011-09-09T03:06:00.002+08:00

ive been playing sims since i reached home till now . anw raya with friends just now & i feel like i didnt take a lot of photos , me not satisfied . but kinda lazy to upload photo also ley . &&&&&& i missed out playing the fireworks cos i went off earlier to meet princess & thought of playing fireworks with princess but all shops were alrdy closed =.= aku pun cry mother cry father . k no lah wtf so lame =.=

this whole week , art art art except for today i lied that im sick just to go out raya . gonna stay till 9pm tomoro , complete drilling or whut . i really wanna try to get & want to get distinction for art , hope so . urm studies like shit , O's in less than 2 months , i seriously dont know wtf is gonna happen to me . i really hope something will knock my senses or wtv .

hmm k i just feel like updating this so yeah bye

i luvv my princess . lol

2011-09-02T23:30:00.004+08:00

think i didnt update for quite long eh , ugh but no one comes here anyway except for princess , i think , occasionally . in case budak ciner comes here , this post was supposed to be on friday , a day after my temperamental shitz which then leads me to 'ignore' you in a way . but wtv , saye rindu budak cinerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr walaupun saye dah jumpe dier semalam . k mcm mushy .

i feel kinda weird i didnt take much photos during raya

2011-08-30T20:52:00.003+08:00

hi me dont really loike today . as per usual if i were to follow my stepfather , it will be dead awkward for me . okay i know this year is just my 2nd time with him/them but i guess it will just be the same . i dont talk to some random stranger & its really awkward when the whole family already knows each other & they are just doing their thing & im here a freaking newbie just stoning there =.= k i dont really know how to explain it but yeah

well the people there is nice , very nice but y'know they've been together as a family & i totally feel extra . now i've made up my freaking mind that i wont follow my stepfather again . next year i rather be at home eating/tumblring than going out with a family that is like a complete stranger to me . i just dont like the feeling . i hate it . but in a way i feel bad cos im like stopping my stepfather from following them . but even my younger brother cannot take it . ugh this kind of family stuff is just so sensitive or idk what word to use . the whole day i kept on tweeting & udating my fb on how dreadful i was towards the trip & how desperate i am to go back home .

i realise when im getting older & older , that 'Raya' feeling is fading away each year . idk mansxz is not really that kind of joy i used to feel last time . to me now raya is just another day , but with some special clothes or whatever . or maybe its because there's a new family & the way it goes changes so im kinda tired of it . even raya money i dont really give a fcuk . but yeah seriously money is not everything , i know money can make me happy by going shopping but i think its like second priority . without that comfortable feeling , i really dont give a shit about anything & what i want is just to be home =.=

k i cannot stop bragging about this . i know last year my blog post during raya was worse cos i almost cried due to the loneliness & how awkward it was being with strangers . k enough . i dont wish to upload any pics cos i look LIKE SHIT =.= idk why im sho lazy to look my best today . i hope this saturday will be better cos going out with mum's side , so yeah .

&& my father didnt pick up my call . called him but he didnt text me or call me back :( wanted to talk to him with my younger bro as well but dont why he didnt respond back . i want my father to know i really love him so much eventhough we rarely meet & also if he feels that he's in a dark time , he is not alone & im here dying to be with him & take care of him & just everything ! heeeesh dont want to recall back previous raya , make me so :( so ayah , ingat saiyidah sayang ayah ! & sadat pun okay ! harap ayah okay !

think i must do well for O's to make my father proud . not to make my mum or stepfather but my father to be proud . but just now at my stepfather's side , all of the kids there did really freaking well for O's & in really good school . i must not lose face hahah at least a poly pls .

hmmm quite a long post , anw i havent count the money yet . but havent finish visiting sial , i still got 2 more sides to go , mum's side & father's side . today also im the one who wants to go back early & in the end making my parent go home also , trip not complete =.= but yeah i cannot take it nvm i can work my ass off after O's to get $$$

2011-08-26T22:39:00.002+08:00

my family from malaysia came here for raya this year . so long didnt see them & omg my relative whom i used to be so close with now kinda turn chubby in a way . awkward right now .

anw i think i bought a lot of stuff from New Look this month . or maybe all my stuff i shop from New Look this month . i think kinda overspent a little bit today , again :/ but nehmind , once in a while self-indulgence . k ah wtv .

short update , imma watch Sekali Lagi , hope it wont freaking lag

2011-08-23T21:59:00.003+08:00

i just cannot stop talking about school . i cant stop talking about how dreadful school is but at the same time i wanna do well in school . i know something is just wrong with my thinking or wtv , like i completely know how freaking important O level is but im just not doing anything to reach my goals . even right now im wasting my time typing this out but i just wanna say it , idk why . i think im just not awake . i totally need someone or something to knock me hard in the head & just mfkg shout at me that i should start a REAL REVISION/STUDY . just 60 days , why cant i just freaking study like mad & for once clear this shit & do well . guess im really slacking & taking things too easily . but really , physically right now im not interested in this =.= omg FML pls me i wanna study & do well :(

but had a really great talk with friends just now . in a way i get to say how i really feel & stuff . they made me feel kinda left behind or smth like that in my studies , which really makes me feel i need to do something to be in the same pace with them , which is good in a way for me . yknow it sucks to know you're not doing as good as your friends & i hope by this i just start cracking up & yeaaaa . ouh & thanks asyikin for doing a new target setting for me . i think its really achievable yknow if i really study hard . k lah of cos lah if study hard may get good grades but really seeing a few of my subject's result i think if i push myself i may get what i want .

i guess my first step to get what i want is to NOT DREAD SCHOOL & prolly love it ? lol but yeah once i think negatively about something , the outcome of it wont be that good :/ so must have positive thinking right right right blogger

first thing first , complete my art 'satisfyingly' . art is like the only subject left which i think i may score higher & i should really put that freaking 110% effort & get at least B3 , k i aim for A2 at first but then i realise its freaking hard =.= lol skali art result i get lesser eh , hah pathetic cry mother cry father . && hope the malay paper i retaking again would be a lot more easier or something .

ouh wow forever talking about studies & doing well but forever lazy =.=

2011-08-22T05:06:00.002+08:00

damned bathing freaking early in the morning is so goddamn refreshing . hmpf , i can feel my eyebag is getting super puffy & sort of sore . stayed up the whole night to chiong my art & i really hope that tay wont ask me to re-do anything again . anw kinda lovin my new site , huhu . k bye blogger . time for sahur , makan makan makan . && wonder if i should go for math mock later on o.o i think i have a lot of mc(s) these days . o level in less than 65 days , i better wake up

@yidargh . new new new follow follow follow can

2011-08-21T14:55:00.000+08:00

2011-08-21T00:46:00.003+08:00

im kinda agitated by myself , just because i lost track of my spending & ending up being completely broke =.= ive already bought my shoes , & 'bag'? but goddamn stupid membership idk why i sign up & cost me 60 bucks . i really really hope my mum will buy from me the bag i just got from New Look . k mum says it looks like a bag for aunty or wtv . wtf its from new look but second glance , i kinda dont like it . anddd mum said to give it to her & i ask for money in exchange for that . pls buy from me :(

on the other freaking hand , i wanna get new clutch . not bag or handbag or whatever . i want a goddamn nice clutch . tsk i also want new heels . went to a website i really want to get my hands on those shoessss . k not enough money i better shut up first .

and ouh my gawd my body fat percentage is 25% . i think it went up o.o god . k ah bye blogger . imma go bathe now . needa rush my art , omg 2 weeks to submission :o

*k i just decided to add in . well , its sort of too personal like my feelings & whats been going through . but i dont really think i should spill it here but i i just feel like saying it somewhere . k its quite huge . bottom line , i just feel tired of life or something :/ and idk , i feel like im never gonna settle down . and another part is , i kinda hate the feeling i get when i sense some people dislike me for being with a certain someone . life couldnt be more suckish huh

2011-08-19T22:39:00.003+08:00

ouh so sad . planned to go to izzy's class but found out it was cancelled cos he's going overseas . ouh well , next time .

mt result , got a B . totally not my goal =.= but 20% distinction , thats kinda quite little . im so gonna retake . but yeah , ive alrdy expected to get a B but i was still hoping to get an A . screw up my oral . hope i can get an A for my 2nd try .

till then blogger . ouh ya im still thinking what shoes and bags should i buy o.o

2011-08-17T16:30:00.002+08:00

eye infection that gives me 3 days mc , so syiok >.< but my eye kinda really hurts that day , i looked like a freaking cyborg or something . anw im bored . like really goddamn bored . i know i can just do some revision or practice my math but i just got no mood :/ i feel like its still holiday . ouh , o level english oral tomoro , i better do my best .

anw idk why yesterday i spent a great time with my younger brother . he is such a freaking irritating dickhead to me , but sometimes he's such a good kid , like really good . lol , weird . shared some things , kids can be such an angel , SOMETIMES . but hope he's fine , hope the caning is not gonna be so bad .

k im really bored & i wanna watch some movies but idk what movie to watch o.o

2011-08-14T17:06:00.004+08:00

catch up with farna & din yesterday , heeee forever funny . i love giving people the cat riddle XD especially seeing their expression after knowing the answer , trolololololol . anw , went to a few dance showcases , i kinda miss dancing now , a lot . but must clear o level firsttt

so urm before this i was just thinking of like to keep reminding myself i loveeeee school to encourage myself to just go for school & get it over & done with & just do my best . not until i went to check my timetable & tomoro's timetable is the worst of the worse =.= but i should love school . i guess the reason why i hate school is because i dont like a certain subject & i went to exeggerate it till i dread it & finally hates school =.= so , from now on , i love all my subjects , i like school .

this is just a way to interest me to school & motivate myself . blogger , y'know i really wanna do well for O's , less than 70 days now . i dont want to waste it . i dont wanna go ITE , cos im taking O level & its totally not worth it if i go ITE . if i take N level , i wouldn't even give so much fuck about my studies =.=

on the other handddddddd , i think i have no mood to raya 0.o

2011-08-09T21:55:00.002+08:00

hi blogger i have nothing to do . first time im home during national day . i dont know whats up with me today . sorry emy , i pai tao-ed you :/ i feel like today i was too hungry till im so fking lazy to go out . cowboys/aliens tomoro XXXXDDDDD

anw , felt like im having a supa long holiday . feel like exams & O levels is over , school is over & im just over here tumblin' all day long . thursday im having sci practical & totally feel so lazy to go to school 0.o after thursday confirm zero mood to go to school alrdy . wait , now alrdy zero , so i guess after that would be negative alrdy . k lame .

i baked butter cookies just now . grandma says it's a lot more better than the previous one . but i still think it kinda taste not nice . im expecting my cookies to taste like famous amos , no wonder im always disappointed with the results . k whatever

y'know , i like to talk to myself at my blog . y'know that blogger ? i know there's no one who drop by here , maybe princess sometimes will go here but other than that , i feel like im one crazy kid talking to herself XD hahah omg i love what im doing . say whatever that i like , no one to stop me & yeah , i think people who are like me should do what im doing . keep feelings to ourselves & then vent it on blogger . i love you blogger , you're always listening to me .
oh my god , FOREVER ALONEEEEE TROLOLOLOLOL

2011-08-09T15:04:00.003+08:00

urgh wtf lah why this movie keep on lagging & stuff ? ! idk if its my com or its just the goddamn movie but its seriously making me so pisssssssssssssssed =.= hmm i feel so lazy , i dont feel like going out . i just feel like eating . 4 more hours to go , oh-em-gee

2011-08-07T14:56:00.002+08:00

dance showdown at ngee ann was quite awesome , eventhough its quite quite underground & not a huge competition . but omg i quite like it yesterday :DDD esp the part i get to taking pic , trololololololol . k there's still more but im kinda lazy to upload on fb

erm k this is so short i feel like typing some more but i dont know what to say . when i come up with something & feel like blogging then i update lah k bye .

love princess love princess miss princess miss princess

Kinda not fair . Not far at all

2011-08-05T21:59:00.000+08:00

regret :(

2011-08-03T21:14:00.000+08:00

2011-08-02T20:13:00.003+08:00

i guess prelim if effed up , like always . nono i should look on the bright side . this prelim i actually really studied , but last minute =.= but its different from those last min studies last time . kay ive already tried my best . i just hope i can continue in keeping consistent in my revision till O's eventhough i know results for prelim is still that bad .

ouhya things get shit-tier eh . cos of this i cant concentrate on last few papers . i dont freaking understand why some people need to control me , especially when outside school . wtf no such thing k . & i also dont know why they need to decide on who i should not mix with . that is my goddamn problem . eff those people . the more they avoid me from it , i feel like the more i wanna hold on to it .

& yeah again eff themmmmm , i love my princess a lot

2011-07-30T15:25:00.002+08:00

what a week :/
& anw , parents wont be buying house sooner :( cos of some COV or idk what shit so im gonna stuck in here for some time again & i really cant wait to get out . hmm actually kinda a lot happened this week . idk why it has to happen during my prelim . kinda too much things till idk where to start . but so far prelim papers were kinda , idk ? i hope there's hope for me to pass .

k imma do science & ss now . ciao . && captain america later . hope he wont pai tao

idk why im really really dreading school

2011-07-26T23:58:00.002+08:00

ugh this always happens few days/weeks before exam , every year =.= but this time i know even if i dont come to school , i should study damn hard & chiong all the way . kay uh may be a bit too late but i hope to at least pass ? if i really cannot do it then i also hope i fail with a nice number , not those really ugly number :/

anw , its a new week . to my princess ;
i know uh last week kinda effed up , but after those shitz i think we start off this week kinda well ? hope it can stay like this , no more shitty times or whatever . i know sometimes or most of the times you tried real hard to control your anger , but i will also try to take more initiative aitesxz :/

Happy Belated Birthday Qistina ; i kinda love children , but only when they are good to me

2011-07-24T19:18:00.004+08:00

*omg is the gif not working?* knn

even when im home i dont know why sometimes i kinda hear their voices 0.o aiyoo im thinking too much . anyway , i really love them a lot a lot XD but i love my princess more

my sore throat & other whatever shitz is stil not curing . hmm think i wanna go clinic & i hope get 3 days straight MC . omg k i have a plan already . im really really dreading school these past few weeks & just nice i have some sickness . but i hope no asthma uh , i feel like its coming somehow . . . lol k pls pls pls 3 days MC

then . . thursday start prelim . not ready k . seriously not ready especially for sci , combine humans & math . i think i really need to get something done or whatever right now . i know ive been saying this for i dont know how many dozens of times & i know till now there's no progress or whatever . but yeah like what asyikin says , i need to force myself . needa do more for art . needa do A LOT for chem , chem seriously can go and die .

k enough . about phototaking , omg sumpah that day i got bad hair day siulsxz . hate it okay . dance fun shot , i really hope my face is not unglam . urgh !@#@%^$%^%$ menyampah lah muker confirm mcm ape =.= but really hope they snap the photo when my head is turned behind . better right than showing that unglam face

2011-07-23T15:45:00.002+08:00

kinda long didnt update . Staying over at my aunt's place for nearly a week now . Most of the time im playing around with my little cousins till i dont care about my tumblr , and yeah blogger lagi2 fb , fb memang boleh gi jahanam . But omg sumpah rindu my cousins . K idk what else to say . I'll do a proper post next time . Lurveeeeee taking pics with my babygirls . Haha

niway , hope my plan will go smoothly tonight :/
& urm , so short eh ni post

2011-07-17T20:59:00.003+08:00

tomoro's timetable is kinda effed up . chemistry , 4 periods of maths & 3 periods of geography . excuse me , saye boleh mati ok . all i dont like , menci menci menci =.= im having like a really bad nose/ear block right now & sumpah irritating . having flu & dont know why till it affect my ears to be blocked , like really that day when i woke up then suddenly everything seems to feel worse & sore & blocked ? not ear shit okay , its like idk what thing . now i feel some sore throat coming & yeah , my voice sounds kinda tired . i dont feel like going school tomoro but its racial harmony day :(

k ah id rather not go school because of my flu which i can use as an excuse & also because of the shitty timetable , VERY SHITTY AKU BOLEH MAMPOS 4 PERIODS OF MATHS =.= summore its not my usual math teacher & now its temporarily replace by this teacher who makes me ... idk (insert word) . but then tomoro is racial harmony day & some of my friends alrdy expected me to wear traditional clothes & its like my very last year in zhenghua so i should not miss it . i find tomoro quite an important day . lol my very last year but on the other hand ive got some shitty things going on like my shitty timetable & my shitty flu + sore throat .

i dont know why im treating this like a big matter when its just a small freaking matter =.= i know ah just make up my mind then everything settle . eh but i wanna wear indian traditional clothes seyh but no one seems to have , no indian girl in zhenghua(i think) , no indian friend

k whatever bye

2011-07-16T01:11:00.003+08:00

Harry Potter with norita , omg its awesome shit . kinda have that impact when watching it . harry potter movies have so much values in it . think back about the first movie till the last , omg that feeling , so hard to explain but nvm . teared a bit when snape died . cried when harry watch snape's flashback or something . that part , was like the most heart-piercing thing in the movie . so fast 10 years went by eh , i didnt read the book , i only watched all the movies & yeah a decade of an awesome movies . jk rowling shouldve wrote another one or two .

anw as-per-normal camwhore & damn wanted to wear my jacket & realised there's something wrong with it . the print thingy kinda like wear off or something ? bottom line , i need new baseball jacket =.= i hope my parents will sponsor .

pantat urh wanted to hear misteri jam 12 but at last got lovebites =.= eeee geramnyer aku dah boleh tahan lamer tk dngr MJ12 . hmmm k i know before i went to blogger i kinda have a lot to say but now i just forget everything . uh wtv anw my rasta bag arrived yesterday X) kekekek k ah i know ah no big deal . but i missed out the part when the postman is supposed to pass it to me . i was asleep yesterday when the postman came . last year when the postman hand me my union jack items , im like one little kid who just got a freaking big teddy bear sey . k ah whatever .

sister ran away again ):

2011-07-14T10:24:00.002+08:00

cb sey came home last month or last few months then stay at home for a while only & now staying somewhere else again . urgh 19 & alrdy staying by herself , k ah not herself but with friends , aku pon nak sey . then all her stuff gone now , feels awkward :/ but i think she got take a few of my clothes , knn shouldve taken a few of her clothes before she left

k im so lazy to go to clinic to get mc . i hate geography . i hate chemistry . A LOT . CHEMISTRY & GEOGRAPHY CAN GO & DIE . DIE DIE DIE . summore both geo & chem teacher kinda like give up on me or something . especially chem =.=

anw i realised i havent been on com for quite long , i think . my fb can go die , blogger like , okay ah i update blogger more than fb . but that day managed to tumblr a bit ^^ heh . kkk my rasta should arrive latest by friday . pls pls pls faster

2011-07-10T21:36:00.002+08:00

hi i feel so dead .
i wanna fast tomoro or something , pay back last year's fasting days which i didnt fast -.- boleh slim down skit ...
i also wanna plan my freaking time properly . prelim in 3 weeks time & now i can still blog , wtf but i have completed all my work for tomoro's lesson k , except for art . k wtv plus i should really stop wasting my time , complete all my work first so i can have enough sleep cos my sleeping schedule is freaking eff-ed up during school days .
&&&& nabeeeeeei international shipping takes around 10 business days so i will only get my bag next week or early next 2 weeks :(

k bye , i realise i like to use this expression(-.-)
anw , i feel like deactivating fb , its so dead . i also dont know what to do with it
-__________________-"

2011-07-09T02:11:00.003+08:00

hiiii bloggie ive not much free time during school days that makes me have no time for tumblrblogfb . especially tumblr & blog =.= sometimes i just like to throw my stories at blog .

1)ive got this transformers stamp & i think its like goddamn dope gila x) imma use for school , stamp an autobot logo beside my name . fuh cannot wait

2)just now i kinda screwed up my O level malay oral . it is so goddamn not satisfying . the convo was kinda hard :/ this totally makes me feel i will get B4 or wtv . im aiming for a goddamn distinction =.= if i dont get at least a B3 , i will retake . i think most prolly i will retake mansxz

3)my rasta bag havent arrive yet !@#&%#%$%^ urgh i hope its not some scam or wtv but no lah dont think so , i got receipt but its been like 4 days . k i know its still quite early but they said they will be shipping it out on tuesday & rasta bag , please come to mummy ! need you for school :( but i still love union jack okay ! just that i want a bagpack & its so goddamn hard to find a union jack bagpack .

4)i cut bangs again , but longer a bit . k i know random

What have i fucking done to deserve this ? Why ? Don't you like me or something ?

2011-07-04T19:02:00.006+08:00

i tried so goddamn freaking hard . I spend hours & hours & this is what I get ? Why don't you give me a chance ? can't you like me for just a day today & give me what I want ? Maybe I shouldn't have wasted so goddamn much time on you little thingy . bastard sia I wasted a lot of time on you & it didn't turn out the way i expected it to be . cbcbcbcbcbcb go die k , you belong to the rubbish bin ! =.=

Transformer 3-D for the second time

2011-07-03T22:42:00.005+08:00

anw my baseball jacket just got kind of decolourisation or some colour mixture or whatever . must be washed in the wrong mode , k wtv i think i wanna get a new baseball jacket .

ouh ya , Transformers 3 again just now X) heeee . actually wanted to go to woodlands & see my baby cousins but my aunt last minute ask me to watch dark of the moon cos she have one extra ticket . then of course uh wanna follow watch my transformers again , hah . still cant help it , i still freaking prefer & miss Megan Fox . Rosie Hunington is like too tall & too 'womanly' . &&& just now when my brother was looking for something in Toys'R'us , i saw many many many transformers toys , like duh toys'r'us of course uh have transformers =.= so yeah , i feel like buying , especially those kinda big ones :o display only lahhh k whatever this is just FYI

*edited new paragraph .
ouh ya bought a rasta bag online , including shipping fees & shit , 41bucks & i think its kinda not worth it . uh nvm i didnt pay for it anw . so yeah hope it arrives ASAP , if can by tomoro ? lol impossible . k new rasta bag , come to mummy now . . k mepek

wanna go sleepover at woodlands next week . mizz staying there & baby cousins when i was in sec 1 . so fast 4 years went by . my baby cousins also kinda grow up so fast , not as cute hahah but still very cute . k this part totally not needed , aku macam feeling-feeling plak . but hey , i miss my 13-year-old look , eventhough there's not much different but life was way better back then

one of the cutest , Qistina< 3 Rinduuuuuuuu

K SERIOUSLY AKU SYIOK SENDIRI =.=
hmm didnt go out this weekend , what a shock

2011-07-02T16:12:00.005+08:00

eeeek havent been on com for soooo long . finally tumblr-ed heh . but anw feel like ive got nothing to update :/ but so goddamn bored right now . its weekend & im not going out & no plans at all . so not used to it & my feet is dying to go out , think i'll go woodlands & meet my baby cousinsxzsxz <3<3<3

things was kinda shitty few days back . k i know its partly my fault but i didnt have any intention & well everyone knows about it plus you know yourself where it started . k whatever i should forget about it =.= alah but im used to it this kinda thingy lah . i rarely get involve in some small shit matter .
in case pig-gy reads this , sorry for saying this about your bestfriend . i - just - wanna - let - it - out .

TRANSFORMER TRANSFORMER TRANSFORMER

2011-06-27T12:44:00.004+08:00

booked tix for transformers 3D . YEZ YEZ YEZ ! lol cannot wait , im gonna watch it on the day it release ^^ durh mcm jakun sia aku . but really cannot wait . k stop it & anw cant help it , im still in my holiday mood . eh i mean im never in a school mood =.= didnt come to sch today , feel like kinda lazy to come to school tomoro . kkkkk gonna force myself to finish up my homeworks now .

*ANW ANW ANW
dont know why im sooo happy . lol . submitted a photo at a tumblr blog which i followed & he actually post it . heee k ah i know no big deal but dont know why so happy
k bye

2011-06-26T23:49:00.003+08:00

camwhore a bit , looooool

back to school tomoro . EEEEEWWWWWW =.= k i just dont like school . i mean not that i dont like but i hate the part when i needa wake up early in the morning & the fact that im staying sooooooo goddamn far from my school && especially forced to learn some things which im totally not interested in & dont think i kinda need it for my future . but i know very well i need a good result for my future =.= k wtv

well urm maybe i should look at things at the brighter side . lol like whut ? k few more months to finish school , in school i can meet friends & blah blah blah . k but seriously i wanna do really well for that big O level . i really hope that study club will help me , cos im never gonna study well at home . i mean at home there's so many distractions , y'know like bed , food , laptop Lol . then ... help out with my younger bro in his studies too ? lol i myself cannot do my work then wanna help others -____-

12am , i havent do quite a lot of my homeworks :/ hmm , tried to do it since 10pm just now but idk im sooooo lazy . tot of just skipping school tomoro but think back , see my schedule & stuff , lol better not . eh , since just now im talking about school stuff . uhh bottom line , today i dont wanna finish my homeworks & starting from tomoro then i will get ... idk whut , get more prepare ? alah whatever lah .

andddd i made somehow pissed :/ dont know if you're reading this , i hope not but if you are then im really sorrrryyyy :( no hard feelings cancancan . i'll find a way to make it up , eventhough i got no idea what should i do o.o

2011-06-26T16:16:00.000+08:00

ugh knnbccb =.= shit shit shit

2011-06-24T22:11:00.003+08:00

:/:/:/:/:/

idk why but i always feel that i dont go up to people's expectation , like people who are really closed to me . i think i kinda treat everything like shit . i myself dont know wtf i want & i dont even know whatheck i should do . its like i want it & i really want it but i just dont seem to be doing anything to get it . i think i dont even treat people right , as in like really right & the way im supposed to freaking treat them . i dont wanna look bad :/ almost everytime i will think & think & think & think & think & trying to figure out what the freaking heck im feeling & what is it that i really want . k i just dont know how to describe it , whatever . kkkkkk but still i wanna let it out . i think maybe this is just not my thing or something . yeah . k bye

OUH OUH OUH ANYWAYS !
just now this maid in my house like kinda irritating or something . i mean i was surfing the net then she came to me & ask me to go to her friend's facebook . i mean i dont mind uh but then she kinda like spend a lot of time jumping to different people's profile & expect me to scroll down the wall for her , looking at the pics one by one till im sooooooooooooo freaking bored of it & super annoyed =.= ! k i know who cares .

but then then then , there's this cousin of mine here who started getting violent recently . i dont know why the heck he turn like that . he's like only 1+ ? & will throw stuff at people . example throwing a shoe , ball , some hard stuff at people . like no manners like that ! k i know ah still small , should understand but this one is like really fucking irritating cannot behave . just now my grandfather beat him cos he's getting way out of control . in my heart i was like - yes yes yes beatttt himmmm . k i sound so bad but really he's really bad . imagine a toddler keep throwing stuff at you & he even dare to throw a fcuking shoe at you repeatedly & you just cant do anything about it cos he's still so small , of cos you will get irritated whut cos you cant possibly do anything to him back -.- k enough enough . i should stop complaining

2011-06-22T01:15:00.004+08:00

camp was awesomeeeee ? well i think first day only . second day was kinda having this tired mood or whatever . plus when we wake up , we're not allowed to bathe . that really makes me feel awful =.= not freshhhhh . but overall its fun fun fun . gossip gossip gossip with those girls , sumpah i love all of them ~ hahah anw learn some tut(s) , first timeeeee

anw came back from camp , showered then sleep mcm babi until 11 plus then till now :D k i know sape kesah but whatever . 4++ am then update , dont know if i can sleep later . uh wtv again , imma try to sleep now

k this is sucha short post but i just wanna update . a proper long post for the next one .

2011-06-20T00:58:00.002+08:00

didnt watch urban floormix :/ but nehmind . town then bugis just now . these few weeks ive been like walking quite a long . idk man , walk-athon or whut ? just now we walked from orchard to bugis , few days back i walked from tampines to bedok & did that quite a few times . whoa , burn those fats mansxzsxzsxz .

anw , think im kinda bored with town . like almost everytime i go out , will go town :/ like first time sey i feel kinda bored at town . window shopped there also kinda like zzz . k maybe if i have a lot of $$$ then wont get bored ah ^^

ermmm according to my clock its 1.06am . i have camp starting at 7.30am & needa get up , get ready around 5.30am later & outta here by 6.15am . lol k i got nothing better to say =.= uh wtv . hmpf , i Still Havent Pack My Stuff . lazy to pack . alah 1 night camp shouldnt take that long to pack eh .

2011-06-18T15:06:00.003+08:00

just woke up , lol k i think my sleeping schedule is kinda effed up . home for todayyyyy

slacked & camwhored at studio , feels like really since i dance ley . uh wtv monday dance camp :D & im on my period . having a period during a camp is so goddamn freaking irritating okay

k idk what to say . err pimple please heal faster ? ouh ya i hope i can finish my development for art by tonight , i hope tomoro they're going to urban floormix , i wanna watchhhhh

2011-06-16T23:51:00.002+08:00

extended my hair . erm . k idk what to say . i wont post any pic of it yet . kinda like it , like kinda find smth wrong . ugh whatever i kinda like it . its part of my plan since last time . lol wtf get money i spend all on this . k now back to no money . mcm forever pokai sey

anw , i got a big fcuking pimple on the center of my freaking cheeks =.= damn irritating can ? ! ugh ugh ugh k whatever short post . i feel like deleting the previous 2 post . i think im kinda over

2011-06-15T22:42:00.005+08:00

I KNOW IM KINDA OVER-REACTING IN MY PREVIOUS POST . HMM NEW POST AFTER AN HOUR . A SMILING PIC OF ME SHOULD MAKE UP FOR IT . HEEEE I SHOULD CALM THE FCUKING DOWN . I SHOULD NOT WORRY ABOUT ANYTHING & JUST TUMBLR . TROLOLOLOLOL . K ANW I FORGOT WHAT MOVIE I WANTED TO WATCH

2011-06-15T21:43:00.005+08:00

i dont know why im kinda agigated over nothing . like really NOTHING . tsk just now before i go on blogger , i know ive got quite a lot of things to say but now , urgh cb luh forgot everything . ouh im kinda irritated by art & homeworks , especially art . ms tay's words keep on playing in my mind & it kinda pressurizing me . k wtv go die lah . tried to finish my art but im forever stuck at abstracting =.=

anw seriously i dont know wtf happen to me now cos i seem to be spending my money away on like , nothing ? i mean i like i could go out with some money with me & when i got back home , i left nothing & brought home nothing . its like , boom disappear or something ? idk this kinda annoy me cos its been going on for a few fcuking months . ive never been this broke before =.= last time i will always have some spare money & some savings . now , not even a single cent . k im just really annoyed cos i got sooooooo many plans , like really A LOT OF PLANS so i thought of saving money but that seems to be not happening at all , lol

i keep on asking from my parents but end up being nagged at cos like i said i keep on asking & every single time i end up spending on some transparent bullshit which i cant see . ugh weird they can buy for me a dslr but they dont wanna spare a 50 fcuking dollar for me when i ask for it . k ah partly my fault , not my luck i think . not my day not my month :/ k wtv i sound greedy . i should not care about money . but money makes me happy :o

ouh ya just remembered what i wanted to say since just now . i really dont like it when people think they know me sooooo well . like they think they know everything about me but actually no . k maybe a lot but not everything okay . you may know what ive did , but you dont freaking know what ive been through so pls dont talk so much about my life , especially when i myself didnt say anything about it =.=

2011-06-13T02:58:00.004+08:00

watched SBDC just now . quite some time since i watched a dance competition , even dancing . lol while watching it just now , had many goosebumps . freshest nutz is hella cute + dope .alrdy expected them to win , those boys in pink deserve it . omg they're like only 14 i think & they have alrdy go damn far , whush (Y) all the best in Las Vegas ~

hmmm , wait for amyrah so long . think imma do it tomoro . kay idk why lately i didnt post much & even if i post , its so damn short =.= like really short & in fact its like nothing at all

anw , i still have kinda a lot of homeworks not done yet . omg especially art

2011-06-11T23:06:00.002+08:00

i like taking candid pics :D

HAHAHAHAH that mouth cute pe

1. whoaw , my mum suddenly wear tudung today .
2. whoaw , i talked to stepdad & mum like normal .
3. whoaw , my stepdad have sucha lot of faith in me .
4. i want to extend my hair asap , amyrah mon pls pls pls

2011-06-10T01:13:00.003+08:00

lol i should just let it go . dont know why i think too much about it .

anw my eyes feel so sorrrrreee . survived 8 hours of maths in school . reached home , dozed off to sleep in my contact lens . thank god my brother was shouting till he woke me up . if not i think my eyes gonna be , idk whut ? =.= k wtv . art maybe extended to 10pm tomoro , hohoho im not going k bye !

mum , dad , stepdad pls gimme extra money i want to extend my hair with amyrahhh

cb luh i so bored at home =.= fcuk luh no money to go out nbcb

2011-06-07T14:52:00.002+08:00

i wont touch my allowance .
i wont touch my allowance .
i wont touch my allowance .

urgh looks like my plan is failing . my dad wont give me money ARGH @!$%&^&^

2011-06-07T13:33:00.001+08:00

i hope money falls from the sky

2011-06-05T04:35:00.003+08:00

cried like shit man . omfg i cried like a freaking baby . idk why if i were to watch a movie on someone having a cancer & they are going to die , i will cry like shit . REALLY LIKE SHIT =.= tears like free flow sial . omg that movie is just sooooooooooooo [insert word] . my eyes is like so sore now & OMFG larh i know that movie is like long time ago but i had nothing to do so i watched it . didnt know it will make me fcuking cry mcm orang gila =.= but super nice movie . k idk why i update , but urm its 4.40am . idk how i can stay up this late .

2011-06-05T00:47:00.003+08:00

i was supposed to follow farna to watch SBDC with her today but i dont know why i woke up so late just now so yeah , didnt go cos by the time i reach there , there will be no more space for us to sit . SO GODDAMN SORRY FARNA ! :( nehmind , i'll watch SBDC finals next week , confirm plus chop chop chop .

thought i'll be home all the way , so CAMWHOREDDDDDDD then followed my aunt out . ordered this mac lipstick , idk how to explain the colour man but idk why i like it so much . first time buy lipstick . pls pls pls arrive faster faster faster . this is why i hate ordering but order from my aunt will get discount so yeah , lol :P im also waiting for my Anna Sui perfumeeeee . agggh cepat arrive puh-leez

2011-06-03T23:31:00.003+08:00

kinda had some talk with norita & asyikin just now . heh asked them some things & kinda poured out everything . seems like im not serious eh ? idk mansxz , y'know i cant avoid myself from feeling anything which i dont want to feel . soooooo , this is just the way i feel . i dont even know if im dead serious about it . its like i dont really give a shit , but at the same time i do . its just so complicated :/ ugh that kind of feeling when everything just crumbled up . i dont know if this is what i really want , i just dont freakin' know what the heck i want .

i dont want to lie to anyone . but there's just part of me that's like - is this how i wanted it to be & another part of me which goes - im just gonna go with the flow & idk whut shit .

k i sound sooooo [insert word] =.= lol wtf

2011-06-02T01:17:00.002+08:00

y'know , sometimes i kinda get moody or even fcuked up for no reason . like totally no freaking reason . i guess its kinda normal eh ? been feeling shitty lately . kinda stern towards mates . didnt smile , didnt talk that much & whenever i see someone , i just feel like that person is irritating/i dont like that person =.= ugh im just so [insert word] . k wtv i hope this mood just go freaking away from me & dont ever come back .

niways , ive been updating my blog quite late these days & the date didnt really match ? i mean im too late to update till the date is alrdy the next day ok who the fuck cares so whatever .

x-men tomoro . I CANNOT FRIGGIN' WAIT TO WATCH . didnt know there's gonna be quite a lot of people who will book the tix & wtf sia checked the seats , almost half full mansxz .

2011-06-01T00:59:00.002+08:00

2011-05-31T00:00:00.003+08:00

1. had Malay O level paper . im not that confident to get distinction , my SA1 i get distinction okay =.= bottom line , it wasnt satisfying

2. went to eva's house to watch this bollywood horror movie with norita as well . the last part i keep on swearing & spurting out craps & cant stop jumping around cos it was so . . suspending ? ahh idk wtv .

lastly , GOSSIP as-per-normal , like you , you & you too :D talked a lot sey , from sharing about those people who alrdy broke their V to talking about this & that & this & that . so funneh . laughed a lot today mansxz , thanks to the 2 gundu(s) , haha . Renondo & kaki/feet <3

wee teckkkkk , wru

2011-05-29T19:17:00.004+08:00

sumpah that chocolate cake pat chalet semalam sedap nak mampos . home all the way for today . cannot go out :( ouh well malay O level tomoro , *heart pounding . but yesterday was kinda , idk whut ?

cos urm , i forgot to bring my Gentarasa ticket to school cos we have our last 'intensive' yesterday & i thought of staying back & go for Gentarasa straightaway from school . skali . . bodoh forget to bring the ticket =.= thank god uh realeased early yesterday , if not i will miss out on Gentarasa . that show is soooooo (Y) , syiok gila . entertaining & at the same time there's something to learn . Bahasa Melayu itu Indah . k mepek but mmg btol

but but but idk why yesterday i took so long to get ready till i was late =.= dont know what i do till i was late . y'know , i plan to go out at 12.30 , then idk what i do again till i go out like ard 12.45+ . then had to cab there , took taxi there , that taxi driver dont know where is UCC , only know NUS . WASTE MY FREAKING TIME . reached on the dot but cant sit with friends :( sat alone sey at the back with some random stranger . bodoh . if only i didnt dilly-dally

k whatever , quit complaining . after that then off to chalat , the cake & kuih lopez shho nice . K BYE . gonna read karangan contoh , i want an A for Malay O level pls pls pls

got my result slip , well again , wabakkk

2011-05-27T20:57:00.006+08:00

2nd post . LOL i hate it when just some few words can really bring me down & like make me think a lot about it . talked to bro . suckish okay . bottom line , its easier said than done . & my mum , urgh wtv you dont know how is it like to be in this kind of shitty situation so i would gladly appreciate it if you could just talk to me in a better tone & wtf lah you think its so easy to get that kind of motivation/spirt or wtv shit to really study meh ? ! =.=

***************************************************************

in for study club . stupid timing in study club , 3 days a week , 2.30 to 6 . no life kepa ? for the sake of O's , 4 more months , tahan tahan tahan

k im still thinking if i should just go out right now . my parents also kinda like fed-up with me cos of my results . but result dah merepek abeh saye lagi nak boleh kluar like wtf gi blaja . ouh first 2 weeks of june mcm boleh mati eh . k actually i wanna update my blog like really update a PROPER post but i keep on saying about studies & some shit uh , totally tak perly . so not needed sak . k whatever but seriously i dont mind sharing my L1R4 , which is 35 & i still have no motivation to study . MOTIVATION LEVEL = 0

niway , i cannot stop tumblr-ing . off to tumblr dashboard

im so sick & tired

2011-05-24T23:04:00.002+08:00

im so sick & tired of school & almost everything ?
whoaa dont know why i kinda feel DEAD . everything's dead for me now =.=

jet black hair , t.o.p's eyebrow

2011-05-22T21:32:00.005+08:00

idk if im wasting my moneh dyeing my hair black . i just wanted a freaking jet black hair , k now its like soooo black . then had nothing to do so i trimmed my left eyebrow like t.o.p haha but this time its kinda messy ? didnt trim it carefully like last time . i prefer the previous one .

OUH can my hair like , grow faster or something ? :( & one more thing . ive been having a lot of breakouts lately . STUPID PIMPLES . MOFO . i never had my face skin as bad as this before =.= its just getting worst & its freaking irritating me =.= !
pimples , blemishes & whatever , please get the fook out of my face

&&& sister didnt came home :( ugh since yesterday mansxz . come home faster puh-leezzz

result wabak gila or whut , single digit mcm cb

2011-05-19T23:23:00.002+08:00

in school like kinda no mood mansxz . i shouldnt have come school today . I MOTHERFREAKING SHOULDNT HAVE COME TO SCHOOL TODAY . got back chem , bio & geog paper today . chem & geog single digit but bio still fail badly . ouh well i know ive alrdy expected this but during bio paper checking , ms loh said some things which which kinda makes me disgusted by her uh . k ah i know i did badly & didnt study at all , not at all but its my marks whut & i know where i stand . you dont need to exaggerate things for me =.= suckish uh today shouldnt have come to school & avoid this lil things which can make me go really eff-ed up .

ouh summore , during bio that jh keep on bullying me & disturbing & hitting me . irritating punya jantan . no mood alrdy then this jh keep on hitting my face with his paper . cb sumpah im freaking irritated uh pls =.= you go dieeeeeee

2011-05-18T23:10:00.003+08:00

firstly , serious or whut cikgu ahmad passed away ? o.o find it hard to believe . now i cant stop thinking of him , remembered last year when he took my malay class , remembered when he always ask me how am i & did i manage to get enough sleep cos he knew i stay faraway from school & he always reminds me to get enough sleep cos every lesson i look tired . kay like cannot stop visualising his face . erm al-fateha ?

kay urm , i despise school . random . unfortunately my form teacher called me today when i was sleeping when i thought she wont even call & forget me . urgh no choice tomoro needa come to school , fook . kay i just dont wanna go for paper checking but for the sake of mother tongue intensive i needa drag my way to school . whoa sumpah i hate paper checking , i dont wanna check art . confirm kena lecture by ms tay , my art visual diary presentation is so goddamn horrible uh pls . tsk but mother tongue O level next 2 weeks , must go for intensive , i wanna do well

2011-05-18T10:52:00.005+08:00

yesterday go sheesha at wrong day uh . they are avoiding under 18 on weekends & public hols cos of some HSA or idk what law =.= but nasib yesterday i can go in , lol stakat but nvm i'll still go for sheesha . on weekdays :D ouh i vomit idk what shit yesterday , can see the laksa i ate . eeeeww lol .

mother tongue intensive starts today . gila . i skip school cos i dont want to go for paper checking :/ & aku slumber je say to my stepdad today is marking day . hmpf i dont want see/know my marks therefore im avoiding sch this week =.=

& idk why uh , idk what i spend on till im so broke right now . sumpah irritating . urgh i hope money falls from the sky right now . gonna sleep , good morning yidah . k merepek bye

2011-05-16T23:44:00.004+08:00

people come & go . some act like nothing had happened & dont give a shit . well i dont know . looking at this entire thing makes me feel lost . so lost . its just so shitty -.- maybe i shouldnt give a fuck . but i dont like it when things turn this way . one moment you're just so good & all went well , then the next moment all went crushing down . like mofo . k i should just forget about this , its over anyways & why the heck am i sounding kinda 'feeling2 emo' ? ouh plus , this incident kinda makes me lost interest in that thing which i thought i will forever love doing it . well then , hope for the better for everyone(:

hmmm and one more thing , pls pls pls pretty puh-leez ! god pls make my dad able to buy a new house :((((( urgh idk whats up with the new law that makes everything delayed . seriously i cant motherfreaking wait to get out of this house & live with my dad . ouh , & ive made many plans for my new room . thats one thing that really makes me desperate to move house . beetch

anw , watched priest 3D just now . haha awesome i cant sit still cos of the sound effects especially since its vampires & its soooo action-packed . but i think ive wasted my moneh watching 3D , kinda like no difference ? uh nvm . & finally , gonna be out tomoro :D long time never go arab street laiosxz

2011-05-15T19:06:00.002+08:00

today = boring .
mum is kinda being over-reacting in a way . i know partly its my fault but pls dont think i wanna stick to you all the way . im waiting for dad to buy a house & that moment im gonna rush to move in with dad so mum , you dont need to bring up the matter cos im impatiently waiting for that day to come & just gtfo of your face =.= urgh beetch . k i know im daughter of the freaking beetch =.= !

last paper tomoro , sci MCQ . then comes MT O level . eh i dont wanna see my results ley . confirm wabak gila , i had my worst art exam this year . i could've done better okay , far better than that

ZZZZZZZ seriously bored nak mampos . think ive tumblr-ed too much till i reached the post which i reblogged two days back . ive reblog nearly 100 for today i think o.O i wanna go out i wanna go out i wanna go out . anw BEASTLY is so dead . expected more but it was zzz all the way -.- k i hope someone will ask me out or something . im dying to go out . k wtf mcm ape sia aku

weather so hot nak mampuuus

2011-05-11T21:23:00.003+08:00

seriously i feel like im melting & always heated up these days . down with flu , makes me umcomfortable in cooler places . dont understand myself , i dont wanna be in a hot place neither do i want to be in a cool place . tk paham aku , k mepek . now im still kinda perspiring but i still dont want to on the fan cos my flu cannot take it =.= this flu also like cb , makes me feel so suckish gila .

POA paper tomoro , not going . BYEEE in advance , k i know random . lost my paint brushes , now how am i gonna do my art ? i hope my adik have A3 paper cos i left mine in class :/ err yeah , cannot wait to finish prelim 1 . haha gonna get O level Malay done with after this .

anw , i think i wanna get hair extensions . plan to get it during june hols . ouh i know fake hair , but please lemme feel like a goddess or something . i miss having long hair okay =.=

2011-05-08T19:52:00.002+08:00

k i spend like the whole day of yesterday sleeping like a freaking pig & today i only left the night to do my things :/ ouh ya ate a lot just now . seriously time flies so fast . left tomoro to revise math & chem , lol . but errr i think i talk far too much about studying & revising but in the end i only did like 20% of it ? =.= cannot control uh each time i wanna revise my bed will distract me . k enough .

neeeeeeed $$$$$$ urgh . bought a few things today . hmmm i still havent buy that dorothy perkins shirt . my sister took away my plain tops & whenever i wanna wear casually im kinda lack of plain tops . stupid .

anw , fb is so boring now . imma leave it like that .

k actually i cannot tahan

2011-05-03T21:39:00.002+08:00

no mood for exam okay , but at the same time i dont want to do badly :/ k i think im taking this prelim 1 too much . i should just chill the fcuk out =.= k seriously there's kinda a lot of things in my mind & i just wanna trash it here but i just dont seem to know where the fcuk to start . whatever lah .

urgh . saya udnir dia , sngt sngt :(

2011-05-02T13:11:00.003+08:00

im home all the way since yesterday . trying to force myself to do some revision or some practice or whatever but i just dont know where to start . too much things i missed out & i dont know which topic to begin with . urgh exam is starting tomoro & sumpah i only like 35% ? k i sound sooooo 'hardworking' wannabe tapi tk menjadi =.= in the end tumblr tumblr tumblr

today i dont know what to do . LOL wtf =.= seriously uh i wanna get something into my brain & like motherfking pass all my papers , excluding poa . poa can go to hell . but if i pass miracle uh . k mepek mepek . so yeah , instead of sparing some time to spend here blogging , i should go & study some shit .

anw anw , my hair is like fking shit alrdy . but i dont care uh . wanna tahan until its long , must avoid myself from rebonding/cutting it . i really wanna my freaking natural hair back =.= i think my natural curls is so much better than my rebonded hair manxsz . now its like ? idk whut ? horrible ? =.= i still remember last 2 years before i cut into pixie hair , im here blogging on i want natural hair also but in the end i cut it like supoer fking short . k this time wont happen . tahan tahan

ouh ya , my blog . i dont think anyone comes here anymore o.0 im like syiok sendiri siuls , hahah nvm luh

2011-04-28T19:39:00.002+08:00

exam next week . i swear i dont understand a single shit for chemistry . my chemistry is just freaking fcuked up . kinda flunk my oral just now :/ some silly & embarassing mistake . i didnt know the word 'improvised' can only be used on non-living thing until just now . i used it on a human . k whatever , no big deal .

so anw bloggie , life's been kinda . . idk , kinda picking up myself ? i hope i will be my oldself back . since last time i keep on nagging i miss my oldself =.= i should just stfu & pray at one corner . so yeah , i dont know what else to say here . but i still wanna blog o.o

feel like blogging again

2011-04-26T21:34:00.003+08:00

whoa , long time since i blogged . dont know why , i feel like going back here again . well i know i didnt delete my blog but kinda left it for a long time without any update . k lah i miss blogging =.= i think i should go back to blogger . tumblr still keeps me going tho .

errr i think no one goes here , so im like typing all these to myself =.= hahah syiok sendiri , k whatever . so yeahhh , see how it goes . tryna 'relive' my blog ? or some shit ?? i wanna be active back on blogger , i guess :/ sometimes , throw out all my feelings here is the best thing , EVER . typing out some shits about people but still keeping it a secret , that kind of shit & yeah . .

kkkk gonna customize some other day

k i forgot anthea's email & i had to post these for my project cos its due tmr :/ k err i dont think anyone even comes here -_-

2011-03-21T23:45:00.002+08:00

Logging: Logging is almost single handedly responsible for clearing acres of forest land. With not so very stringent laws and easily bendable ones, most developed countries have not only wiped out their own forest for timber, but have indiscriminately cleared forest cover from their colonies or poor countries. Presently, logging is the most important direct threat to forest regions world over.

Agriculture: An alarming rate of forest land is being converted into agricultural land and plantation to sustain a large population for use of crops and presently, bio-fuel. With forests being cleared, growth in agricultural land is becoming a major cause of carbon emissions. Cleared patches of forest land when used for growing subsistence crops, degrades the soil's fertility after a few years of its use, forcing the farmer to clear more land, eventually clearing out an entire forest.

Mining: Forest not only contain precious life, but also precious minerals, that we humans so desire. This desire to dig up the Earth to acquire them, especially from poor or development countries in lieu of monetary aid and technical know-how has resulted in loss of forest land.

Lack of Political Will: Most damages to the environment stem from weak or an indifferent attitude towards a way of life we fail to understand. Most forest protection laws never get passed or are followed to the hilt, because some one needs to make a profit, and someone needs a favor

2011-02-27T03:23:00.001+08:00

i hope things turn out well . dont know why i dont feel good . like scared if its lost & gone away . well , i believe everything happens for a reason , but i swear ive never had something like this happening to me before

OUH SHIT

2011-02-17T22:13:00.001+08:00

ssshhhhhiiiiiittttt
omg omg fuck this shit lar
shit shit shit shit shit

2011-02-13T16:03:00.002+08:00

blogger !
sucha loooooonnnnnggggg time since i update . hmmm i think no one comes here . lol nvm i just feel like coming here to update . i feel like using blogger again , but of cos will be still using tumblr . just that at blogger , you can vent all your feeling & words in sucha long post . i know we can do that at tumblr too but tumblr is more of post of pics quotes & very very very short post .

anw , my life is soooooo . . i dont know what to say .
feel like i have no direction of where im going . im so lost these days . like that kind of 'LOST' . y'know like you totally dont freaking know what you're doing or talking . kinda frustrated of myself , i dont know why . i think its all bcos of that person . whoa feel like killing that person =.=

k this so absurd , i feel like stopping here suddenly .
i'll update this when i update again eh

imma-dothisshit.tumblr.com

2011-01-26T19:57:00.000+08:00

i want lakers apparels

2010-11-28T14:40:00.005+08:00

been quite some time since i update a PROPER POST . okay half of my time im tumblin' & dont know why i feel like updating blogger today eventhough i know my blog is so DEAD & no one even comes here except for anthea (i think) who comes here occasionally & force me to update .

niways , i needa lose weight . everytime i went out with my parents , i will only eat nasi ayam penyet . i dont touch other foods 0.0 yesterday & friday , went out with my parents & aunt to buy some stuffs & ive eaten nasi ayam penyet for 2 days in a row , AT NIGHT SUMMMORE , GEMOK sia =.= but still im the one who asked for it so yea whatever .

ive got many things in mind that i really want . i wanna get that union jack pouch or smth like that , another union jack bag & that kinda long union jack shirt or is it a dress ? &&&& i want lakers jersey & other apparels , VERY NOOICEEE . LAKERS LAKERS LAKERS . plus , i think i wanna get a rasta bag , shirt ? whatever . yesterday ive bought another rasta headband , now i got 2 =.= i thought the new one would be better but when i tried it , arghhhh not really what i expected it to be .

well i wanna buy a lot of stuffs huh . lol i talk a lot , money also not that much =.=

fook lar why blogger upload photo so late =.=

2010-11-23T19:54:00.004+08:00

okay seriosuly i dont know what to type . fox keep on asking me to update cos my blog is so dead . hmmm well , updated ~ dyed my hair , i kinda hate it , kinda okay with it . no comment k bye

2010-11-02T01:09:00.002+08:00

why the fcuk am i like this ? i think its really true my 'sunflower' days is so goddamn over . but i just cant seem to accept it . why does it have to be this way ? why do things change ? why do i fcuking change ? the old me is so dead & gone away , i really hated that . i wanna be that 13 year old girl with that lively smile , happy life & everything nice . i want my oldself back , i really really want my oldself back .

it may sound kinda crappy of me always whining about wanting my oldself back . but most people dont know . THEY DONT KNOW . THEY DONT FCUKING KNOW ! right now , im just the opposite of my oldself , i guess . things were not like this back then .

i used to have tons & tons of 'these' things back then . but now , i dont think anyone notice that in me , when actually last time people ALWAYS tell me that . its kinda strange ? i dont know . it just frusts me . okay its not like im an attention seeker or something but i always got that attention , i think . but yeah i know it myself i always have it . then just one mother fcuking day things seems to change . i have none now , when i actually used to have tons of it last time .

it really bothers me when those new people in my life think lowly of me . okay its another meaning , not really think lowly of me but in some areas they think lowly of me . well , they know nothing . completely NOTHING . i mean i notice the change myself . but because i know my oldself & the new 'me' is totally opposite , those new people whom ive met dont really who the heck i was last time . i know who cares about the past . but its me , i just frustrated that im not my oldself anymore .

fcukthisshit . i just want my oldself back . that loud , talkative , loves to camwhore , lively , hyper , always get praised by everyone & yeah that girl whom i am last time .

i dont know why god make things like this . im sick & tired of trying to pretend like my oldself . i believe everything happens for a reason but ive had enough of this . i know im picking up myself & i know you freaking gay bastard completely underestimate me =.= k i sound [insert word]

but i really hope god will change me back to my oldself . i just miss that old me . i want to be happy .

2010-10-29T02:34:00.003+08:00

kay now where should i start ? bottom line , i hate my mum , A LOT . i know ive always talk , complain about her & vent my feelings here . maybe people might think im sucha disgrateful person for saying such things to my own mum . but , the thing is , they dont know . THEY DONT KNOW . you guys dont know a single thing

my mum is definitely not like any other mother . i hope she's not my mother & i also hope im not her daughter . i dont even know why i am born by a person like her . okay im starting to get kidna dramatic here -___- but how i wished i dont even exist , especially with her as my mother . i dont know why she's my mother & i also dont know why she gave birth to me . id rather not exist in this world than to become her daughter . i think im biased ? im okay with my father & my stepfather , but im definitely not okay with my mum , that sickening slut =.= okay so im telling myself that im the daughter of the slut ? k whatever .

i dont ask anything from her . i think she get all she wanted , i think she's happy with her new husband , having everything she wants . i dont want anything from her . i dont think i need that kind of parental love or whatever shit . in my views , i think my mum failed to become a good mother . she totally failed it .

she's the reason why my father ends up like this . even my brother , i think she's the one who brought up many problems to my family . my father definitely made the wrong choice of marrying her . i know without her , i wouldnt be here or whatever . but like i said id rather not exist in this world than to become her mother fcuking daughter . if only my father didnt marry her , my father wouldnt end up like this . i feel like she's the root to all of our problems , this mother fucking slut =.=

i only want my own time from her , or is it freedom ? yeah i just want freedom . she expect me to stay at home every single day . going out or staying at home dont really make a difference , i wont see her =.= my mother always locks herself up in her room with her husband , i dont talk to her & she dont talk to me . but everytime she finds out i went out , she will ask me to be back home , by 9pm =.= 9PM , lol no life . 9PM so goddamn early lah you @$%@$ . but i just want freedom , nothing else okay . she's really getting into my way & it really frusts me . even good results wont bring me any freedom . she only wants me to stuck at home & stare at the goddamn walls

yet just now , she said vulgarities to me . LOL she said vulgar words to me . now , i dont even think she deserve any respect . what a way to lecture me . those vulgar words coming from my own mother really turns me off . so now the reason why i say vulgarities is because my own mother uses them & from there i was taught to use vulgarities from the examples ive heard

& yes i am ashamed to have a mother like her & i couldnt be bothered to try to be a good daughter to her . my brother has given up on her . my younger brother dont rely on my mum cos my grandparents is alrdy like my younger brother's parents . my siblings dont like my mum , especially my brother . i guess we siblings dislike this same person . i give up on my mum . i dont wanna look at her face

dead bored , out to shop in the morning now

2010-10-26T11:00:00.001+08:00

2010-10-25T18:47:00.002+08:00

im craving for ice-cream , chocolates , donuts & more & more food since yesterday . i dont know why im craving for FOOOOOD these days . i eat a lot more than i usually eat . i ate 3 meals within 6 hours yesterday but im controlling myself not too eat anymore today cos i guess im growing fatter . but seriously i wanna eat all those food , i think i will wait till my bro comes back home so i can ask him to go down to the mart with me

walao i very bored arh

2010-10-24T19:19:00.002+08:00

update very very short post on tumblr , now bcos of major boredom i update blogger =.= no mood to reblog anything , idk why . but , having a flu now , FML lah everytime i wanna wipe my nose , my nose stud will like , pulled or something =.=

anyway SUXIU ! i think you just gimmi your whole box lah . mine left 2 only ! :(

wtf is wrong with facebook ? !

2010-10-19T19:26:00.002+08:00

urgh hateschoolhateschoolhateschool
but needa go back tmr , skip 2 days dengan slumber je , feel like weekend
gosh , drop to sec 4NA pls instead of retain , fcukthisshit

HA-HA-HA shut up me

2010-10-19T16:16:00.002+08:00

LOL im so goddamn mother fcuking pissed . it really frusts me , REALLY FRUSTS ME & I SWEAR I FEEL LIKE TEARING MYSELF APART . i know i cant blame anyone but once i said i dont want to know my results , I MOTHER FCUKING ABSOLUTELY MEAN THAT I DONT WANT TO KNOW MY RESULTS . isnt my line so freaking clear ? ! my god i feel like jumping down . it really make me feel like , urgh i dont know what the fcuk is it but its really making me frustrated .

I GIVE UP ON MY STUDIES OKAY , TOTALLY GIVE UP . I DONT MOTHERFREAKIN' CARE ABOUT MY RESULTS & AT THE SAME FREAKIN' TIME I ALSO DONT WANT TO KNOW MY RESULTS . SO EVERYONE STOP GODDAMN MOTHERFCUKING INFORM ME ABOUT MY RESULTS , IT REALLY PISSES THE SHIT OUT OF ME . I JUST DONT WANT ANYONE TO TELL ME MY GODDAMN BAD RESULTS , I KNOW I DID BADLY AS I ALREADY GIVE UP ON THIS STUDY SHIT BEFORE EXAM STARTS SO THE OUTCOME DEFINITELY SHOULD BE BAD . I DONT CARE IF I JUST PASSED MY PAPER OR FAIL BADLY , I DONT WANT TO MOTHER FCUKING KNOW IT ! IS IT LIKE SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND ? ! IM SURE IVE ALREADY SAID I DONT WANT TO KNOW MY RESULTS THROUGH MY FB & IVE REPEATEDLY TELL MY FRIENDS THAT . SO WHY THE FCUK THEY STILL TELL ME ? ! SHIT OKAY

IM NOT ANGRY AT ANYONE BUT ONCE PEOPLE TELL ME ABOUT MY RESULTS , IT FREAKIN' PISSES ME OFF . I DONT KNOW IF ANY OF MY CLASSMATE CHECK ALL MY PAPERS BUT I PREFER MY PAPER NOT TO BE IN THE HANDS OF ANY OF MY CLASSMATE BUT EVEN IF THEY HELPED ME CHECK MY PAPER , PLS DONT GODDAMN MOTHER FCUKING TELL ME MY RESULTS LAH MOTHER FCUKER . JUST KEEP IT TO YOURSELF , EVENTHOUGH I KNOW THAT RESULTS IS FOR ME .

THIS GODDAMN STUDY SHIT CAN REALLY MAKE ME GO INSANE . I TOTALLY GIVE UP ON THIS , IM PREPARED IF I NEED TO RETAIN OR WHATEVER SHIT . BUT DEFITELY I WONT WANT TO RETAIN & PREFER TO DROP TO SEC 4NA . IM SO SICK OF STUDYING & IT DONT INTEREST ME AT ALL , I MEAN IT NEVER INTEREST ME AT ALL . I HOPE I CAN JUST CLOSE MY EARS IF MY TEACHERS WERE TO TELL ME MY RESULTS . I HOPE MY TEACHERS WILL JUST SHUT THE FCUK UP THEIR MOUTH & JUST TELL ME STRAIGHT IF IM PROMOTED OR NOT

2010-10-10T18:13:00.003+08:00

cis ! nak hidop mcm sec 1 lagi luh !
k whatever i realise i cant do this thing , OK just fcuking ignore it okay me .
math & poa tmr , i havent even do a single shitty revision on it . i spend my whole friday & saturday doing 3 page of my art , thank god ive complete it . aiya math & poa if i study also no difference =.= whatever , i seriously dont wanna know my exam results , just tell me if im promoted or not

ive got my double nose piercing since like a week ago & till now no one in my house realise it . i put on one tranparent & one yellow stick , its not obvious (Y) ! gonna do something to my hair but i dont know what to do with it . feel like getting a new fringe but my sis says dont cut it . okay whatever bye , so absurd huh

emath = KILLER

2010-10-07T20:23:00.002+08:00

8pm , i havent revise for geog 0.0
all the best okay yidah , all the best
think im gonna flunk my paper .
well actually i flunk all my paper

2010-10-04T21:12:00.005+08:00

i want to forget about him , completely , completely forget about him . he's the only guy out of so many guys which i knew last time that really got me so goddamn fcuking crazy over him . held this on for so long , nearly 2 yearsxzc . i swear no one ever did this to me & i cant believe im like this towards a person , this is so [insert word] .

i remembered when i get to get in touch with him again for a short time last year which is after we drift apart for nearly a year . i felt like i was the happiest kid in this world having to get in touch back with the person i freakin' miss so much & hoping to get in touch back . i kept that few messages in a folder in my phone i wish that same text will be sent again to me , LOLX . but nah , i want him out of my mind . i did it okay , i did try to just FORGET everything about him but i dont know why i suddenly think about him moments ago . so im doing this last post of him hoping i will be over him completely after this .

i look back & guess everything happens for a reason , i mean everything really did happen for a fcuking reason . GOD IS TOTALLY GREAT <3 also , i realised i did change a lot , seriously A LOT . whoa sec 1 , tsk cheeky sia me , but i swear when i was 13 , i had the best year of my whole fcuking life . i live my life to the fullest , do many stupid things , had quite a lot of contacts & stuffs . sec 2 , beginning to 'rilek' alrdy . lost many many friends , i changed my number & didnt tell them & i dont know what happens till i changed to a quiet person , like totally quiet 0.0 & still like this till now . i totally want my oldself back , my 13-year-old life back . thats why i wanna be 13 forever & im trying to do back all the stuffs i did back then , just to feel 13 again . but im never satisfied with my current self .

i hope i change again , i would like to be my oldself back , i mean i want .
okay this exact same post is also up in my tumblr . just wanna have the same post , only for this post . i think im gonna go back to blogger again . tumblr just to post some quotes & pics , blogger mainly to express my feelings/words out ?

lastly , im not prepared for EOY . i just want to get over with those papers , so yeah whatever

farna & suxiu left me alone :(

2010-08-23T21:31:00.004+08:00

unionjack-love.tumblr.com

im not gonna delete my blog . 3 YEARS of entries , very very very
precious to me mansxz . but still , tumblr has so many quotes which
makes go gugugaga

FCUK-YES

2010-08-18T20:30:00.002+08:00

credits to tumblr

think im gonna shift to tumblr really soon , trying to learn here =.=
ahahah im a tumblr lovr <3
but definitely , i wont delete blogger , so much memories :(

hello

2010-08-15T15:16:00.002+08:00

bought quite a lot of illegal dvds from johor yesterday . finally i can watch all those movies , but knnbccb they didnt sell street dance & step up 3 =.= still remember yesterday me , my mum , younger bro & aunt keep on shouting & screaming in the car when i found a cockroach crawling in the car . k whatever

anyways , i love tumblr quotes mansxz . i love reading people's tumblr , well not exactly what they blog but i only love to see the pics they reblogged . gosh some really apply to my current situation & it really hits me man . i've already did a tumblr , but i dont know how to use it , HAHAH . but then , ive got so much memories+stories at blogger , 3 years of entries okay ! lol okay this is so [insert word]

school tomoro , FML idontwannagotoschool idontwannastudyanycrapsthatimnotinterestedin

FML

2010-08-11T20:51:00.002+08:00

i just type a whole bunch of paragraphs trying to let out my feelings but deleted it cos i think im going too far . basically , FML . FUCK MY LIFE TODAY . i get pissed off by the little-little things today . if you are reading this , i want you to know that im disgusted by your actions , & thats why my reactions & attitude is totally so-not-needed towards you .

well , i hope the one who feel the pinch is the person im referring to ; cos many people made me pissed off today & i dont know if im soooo moody today or whatever . urgh , gonna rush things now . lets hope for the best tomoro

if i drink alcohol , i cant pray/fast for 40 days huh ? tsk dayum

2010-08-10T01:50:00.002+08:00

firstly my hair , tell ya now its like so goddamn jialat alrdy . gonna rebond soon , MUST ; with SuXiuuuuuuuuuuu . city area for national day . slack with girlfys first then chill at night with other mates . k basically im uploading all the pictures i snapped just now & FVCK it failed .

2nd try & waiting for all the pictures to upload took me around 40mins before it says "uploading failed" , very very the KNNBCCB right ? of course , more & MORE pictures up at facebook later [after uploading pictures success] , but which i know you people wont bother to look at it =.= anyways , while waiting for it to finish uploading , im updating my bloggeh & loading Inception movie .

i dont plan to sleep tonight . i wanna watch movies which i havent watch when the whole world has alrdy watch it =.= k i hope photo upload wont failed , please please please

ouh ya , just now we were chillin' & i dont know why i cant resist from drinking . setan around me mcm sial ! walao its been sucha long time since i drink then now i drink again . worst thing , i got to know i cant pray/fast for 40 or 44 days . what the heck uh fasting month coming in a day . SOYAL btol ! but i did some research , lols & im still obliged to fast/pray eventhough i drink :/ tapi tk de pahala . . . nevermind , can slim down =.=

2010-08-07T22:52:00.002+08:00

my drawing dont really look the same as it looks when i took a pictures of it :/ durh its an old art assignment . so today , kinda short . not too long but also not too short . accompanied dian & went to Lot One . haha thank god she ask me out taw , if not she will be PAI TAO-ED by suxiu . ELLL-OUH-ELLL suxiu like to bubble only .

bought some crop tees & this part i totally cannot believe it . i cannot believe that i bought a red lipstick 0.0 Y'KNOW WHAT ? ! I TOTALLY LOVE RED LIPSTICK(S) TO THE MAX ! ZZZ i dont wear lipsticks except for lip balm :/ was just walking around & had nothing better to do so i took random tester & tried it on . next thing i knew i LOVE red lipstick & bought it , ELL-OUH-ELL ? haha LOL YIDAH ; heehheeee can wear RED lipstick for national day X) cos its RRRREEEDDDD , k lame . eh havent take picture with red lips uh , k whatever =.= RED LIPSTICK FCUK THE WORLDDDDDDD

btw , i had the awesome-est national day concert at zhenghua on friday , hahah . like concert , we were jumping & singing to national day songs like mad . i was soooo over hyper sia . we create unnecessary noises , shout for the performers like hell & even cheered for the teachers who wanna make announcement , its like we shout & cheered even for the the smallest thing =.= but its FUN XD next year , all seat at the same seating arrangement & do it again ehk ! hahs

k i think i lose hope for teacher's day audition , now im lazy & dont look forward to it . feel like not doing it , like totally lazy ; but well we will seeeeeeeeeeeeeee

2010-08-03T18:54:00.002+08:00

snapped this at Shanghai , KIIUTZ

my science test totally CMI , especially my chemistry . had science test today then the day before that i can still go bugis to shop around instead of revising my work . i dont know why for the first time im able to more of bio questions than chemistry , but i think both also cannot make it uh . actaully not only science , my studies is totally CANNOT MAKE IT , ALL the subjects =.= tsk nothing to aim for o'level uh , college west/east will do luh

POA test tomoro , DIE . then thurs SS test , CMI also . i think i should at least re-do the 4 POA questions again . should get something into my brain for tomoro's test . ouh , there's art also . wait , ART i can do it , heheheh . my art is not soooo bad as my other subjects okayyy . from term 1 till now art i get straight As okayyy , yea okay shuddup me =.=

actually , i have been thinking a lot about MONEY nowadays . i want more $$$ , i want to shop for MORE clothes , MORE shoesxz , JUST EVERYTHING I LOIKE ! & btw , me & SX been planning & thinking a lot about slimming down - LOL =.= i wont run & since we can use studio around bedok area now , we wanna buy BICYCLE & GET ACTIVE & CYCLE TO/FRO THE STUDIO & EXCERCISE TO LOSE FATS AROUND MY FREAKING THIGHS . yeah since cycling has got to do more with our legs , i think i should cycle to lose weight in my thigh :/ but we are planning to buy a bicycle only after raya , hahahahahahaah PATHETIC RIGHT WE =.= i needa lose weightttttttt X:

think im gonna be indian soon

2010-07-31T19:53:00.003+08:00

watched My Sister's Keeper . k i know that movie is like so goddamn long long time ago but i only knew about it this year so i watch it . i cry & cry & cry all the way when i was watching it , non-stop sak

ouhya im getting darker , like REALLY darker . i dont fcuking know why =.= compare to the last few years , im so dark now . it makes me go , WHAT THE FREAKING EFF ! maybe too much outside activity :/ i wont join chingay/ndp/whatever anymore

k i wanna go out tomoro , i dont care i wanna get out of this house tomoro . im home so early today , had math remedial this morning followed by malay project then window-shop around lot one with noritateo . norita asks me questions which really makes me remember about the past & makes me go WOOOOOOOOOO O-M-G (X , lol good times good times . still staying in the heart

2010-07-28T20:20:00.003+08:00

THAT FOXY SAW EN YUH ANTHEA FOX SAYS MY HAIR HAS GROWN XD OMGOSH BEST ! kk anyway about my hair , 2 days ago on monday , 26 July 2010 , it marks the 1 year of me cutting my hair , that stooooopid pixie-boyish cut . if i didnt cut my hair in between these 2 periods , my hair would be longer by now . especially on march when that freaking hairdresser cut my hair so much shorter =.=

im also thinking of rebonding my hair again , YEA LIKE AGAIN ? ! & ALSO ! jing rong also says my hair has grown , lonnngggg already X) & she says its like my sec 1 hair . hah sort of , except that the sides of my hair is a bit longer when i was in sec 1 . ouh kkkkkk whatever before raya i wanna rebond my hair , gonna be the last time im gonna rebond my hair , PROMISE MYSELF

definitely , i need to control myself from spending too much . maybe watching streetdance this saturday & i was thinking of buying some clothes as i bought heels last week & i havent buy any clothes for sucha long time & only spend my money on shoesxz . wait , i think i wanna ask my father to gimmi some $$$ to increase my budget

& YEZZZZ thank god my grandfather will come back to SG from jakarta by tonight . my younger bro troubled me by having to fetch him from school for 3 days straight this week , me dont like !

k , off to find malay quotes for project now . stupid malay project need to somewhat compose a lyric & SING it to the whole class , very very the KNNBCCB

i think my laptop is gonna die soon . it starts to get laggy

2010-07-25T23:45:00.003+08:00

performed just now , some kindabit crappy event to me & yeah , totally love didi's + emy's choreo . but well , i could've did better , just forgot some steps :/ k next . i'll upload the pics & tag the others as soon as possible kkkkkk . upload the photos liao , but waiting for it to be uploaded to FB is like waiting for snow . so push it to my free time .

i havent do my POA hw . crap , this week im totally pack sia all my hw not done yet . malay project to be completed in a week's time . i totally dont wanna sing , fcuk this shitz .

btw , i give up on Eclipse .
im just gonna buy the CD when it's out then i can watch it 1029342365785 times & replace the time which i had planned to watch it =.= then then then next saturday ,
i wanna watch STREETDANCE !
kkkkk dance movie confirm i loike ler , lovvvveee it (X hope this one works , sure work nyerrr !

'ouh-ver-dew' pichas

2010-07-22T22:21:00.004+08:00

got nothing much to say , i just wanna . . update this bloggeh =.= k just now jazz warm up was like super duper good warm up which makes me go WTF cos one of it looks like fcuking or something -_______- & when ms chun + mdm fauzana saw me , they asked me how am i & if im fine or nottttt , made me go :/ tsk i think i didnt saw them for sucha long time cos i back out from the awards day performance so we didnt see each other for awhile . k whatever i know you will go whatever .

saturday i will die die watch Eclipse with SX & after that im planning to buy heels cos a few boutiques is having a further reduction sale till 25th so i must die die grab it , k i sound so wtf . i realised something , i have been buying shoes & planning to buy shoes only . i need to top up my closet 0.0 i needa shop for clothes man , i wanna go SHOPPINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

Got my new Pastry kickFourth attempt to watch Eclipse failed

2010-07-19T17:40:00.003+08:00

im sooooooo lovin' it , my NEW BABY !
Reebok , Adidas , Baby Phat next pls ibu :(

ouh & SX got a pixie haircut like mine last year .
i was too late to stop her , CONFIRM she regret
cutting her hair ! but my baby still look pretty (X

last saturday was my fourth attempt to watch eclipse . i did meet up with sx but we went somewhere which makes her procastinate to watch it some other day cos she cant stop puffing & puffing & puffing . this coming wednesday , my fifth attempt . ouhmyfreakinggod pls let me watch it =.=

hmmm just some random update , till then .

2010-07-15T22:35:00.002+08:00

PAI TAO-ED

i think GOD don't want me to watch eclipse .
today is my third attempt to watch eclipse & yeah , this time some problem befall my friend which in the end cancelled our whole plan . It's really really really fcuking weird , 3 times i tried to watch the movie but there's always last minute problem . GOD really don't want me to watch eclipse huh ? If next time , which is the fourth time I wanna watch eclipse & some problem mother fcuking arise , confirm plus chop chop chop GOD don't want me to watch eclipse .

Eclipse tomoro , promise ! SX i promise you i wont bubble anymore

2010-07-14T16:53:00.008+08:00

my bro is being sucha jerk he didnt wake me up when my phone alarm clock rang cos he was using my phone to call his friend & when my alarm rang , he just off it & didnt wake me up . i know , sucha bitchassjerk right ? now i missed school again & today i cant watch eclipse with SX , yeah we postphoned it to today then now i postphoned it to tomoro cos my mum wont let me out if i skip school =.= i dont know why when i dont wanna skip school , some problem will befall me which makes me didnt go to school . when i can go to school , i will be fcuking lazy to go school . IRONIC . actually i know i can still go to school but yesterday i was late & Mr Poon (?) gave me some talk cos i was late more than 3 times + im staying at bedok so he talk a lot asking me to go out earlier so of course i dont want my ezlink to be at blue room again & face him again what !

ouh , i still have my Chem holiday assg undone . fyi , now im starting to hate POA so fcuking much cos i totally got no idea how to do cos i missed out a lot of lesson ; so far i missed out 6 periods of POA since school started . 6 divide by 3weeks = 2 periods missed out every week . hmmm i need to hide my phone from my brother now

duh ; ol' pic , miss my hair

2010-07-07T14:26:00.002+08:00

fever since few days ago . that day it reached up to 39 degree celcius manxsz . yesterday went to school but i go home during poa period , kekekeke . 38.9 DC then i got MC for yesterday & today . hmpf im missing alot of math & el :/ k whatever

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hmmmmm whats up with that sudden post ? its so obvious right ? you have said something which makes people think im like this but actually i dont , right ? you . . . you just want them , right ? & you dont want me to get near them right ? its written all over your face . you cant lie . you definitely cant lie cos your actions speaks a million louder than your words which is truly what you dont mean . its better if you just be frank with me , but bcos you lied , its making me feel :/